Online Workshop Review

Please read this document or review one of the workshop videos before arriving at Nelly’s By Night on Saturday, January 26th.

For those who like a review or who learn better through reading, this is a review of our online workshop for metatechniques and mechanics used at Nelly’s By Night. There will be a brief recap of these before our onsite workshops, and the online workshops are available for review here:

• YouTube, January 8th: Video
• Facebook Live, January 20th: Part 1, Part 2
• Facebook Live, January 23rd: Video

We decided to hold some of our workshops online and provide this documentation online as we understand that the demands of work, parenting, chronic illnesses, and travel can limit the time that many can commit to an event. At the same time, we believe strongly in the importance of workshops to the experience and to safety. It’s our hope that this will provide multiple ways to engage with and understand key information and allow participants to feel more confident about safety basics before the evening of the event. We are available for questions before the event, and Gary will be available in the out-of-character space during the event.

The Most Important Thing

All these techniques and mechanics help make a larp safer while giving players simple ways to opt-out and opt-in to roleplay while maintaining immersion. However – if you can’t remember any of them and you need help, there is nothing wrong with just taking a moment off-game to say so. It’s also perfectly fine to talk to an organizer briefly in the game space or in the out-of-character room if you need help. Larpers that are experienced with these techniques sometimes forget them too!  The main thing is that you feel safe and have fun, and that others around you feel safe and have fun. If that goal is achieved through different means, that’s perfectly OK!

Security

The house doorman-slash-bouncer at Nelly’s will provide in-character and out-of-character security for the evening. Jesse is an experienced actor and longtime larper who has worked as club and event security around the city for 20+ years. As his role is in and out-of-character, asking to speak with him privately would not be unusual for any of the characters. If you would prefer a mediator, you can speak to or text one of the organizers. (We will provide an emergency text number before the event.) We trust everyone to trust one another and behave appropriately but if there are issues, Jesse has our full trust to handle any situation professionally.

Safety Metatechniques

We are using a few techniques to make safety and opting-in and out of roleplay easier.

Cut: Calling ‘Cut’ stops action in this larp. You can use it for any reason and the reason does not need to be questioned beyond what help you need. Sometimes, there is a reluctance to call ‘Cut,’ but if you feel you need to stop action for your own safety, please do so and we will work it out. Your safety as a person is more important than continuing play uninterrupted. More on Cut here: https://nordiclarp.org/wiki/Kutt#Kutt_as_a_personal_safe-word

Lookdown: Covering your eyes with your hand and glancing downward is the ‘Lookdown’ gesture. It is used to opt-out of roleplay you are not interested in participating in for whatever reason or if you have somewhere else you need to be (even the bathroom!) It can also be used to opt-in to scenes that you would have been there for (i.e.: clan or council meeting) by reversing the gesture as you enter the scene

More on Lookdown here: https://participationsafety.wordpress.com/category/calibration-mechanics/

OK Check-In: This tool allows players to communicate with each other out of character about their well-being without pausing the flow of play around them. One player makes the OK hand sign at the other one: “Are you OK?” This is a quick and simple way to check in with players to see if they are playing emotional distress or actually in off-game emotional distress.

The other player can respond in one of three ways:

Thumbs Up – All is well and play can continue

Meh/So-So – ‘I don’t know’ or ‘Meh.’ This should be treated as a thumbs down.

Thumbs Down – No. The player is not ok.

In the case of the last two responses, ask the player what they need. If they are unsure, please offer to walk them to the out-of-game room. What is wrong is not important, just what help they need

More on the OK Check-In here: https://participationsafety.wordpress.com/2016/09/09/toolkit-the-ok-check-in/

Pronoun Correction: If someone uses another player’s or character’s pronouns incorrectly, please simply correct them. If you use pronouns incorrectly and are corrected, repeat the correct pronoun and thank the person who corrected you. Mistakes are made. Continued misgendering is unacceptable and should be brought to attention of the organizers.

The Second Floor: Feeding and intimacy roleplay – even if it’s just a scene that’s discussed between participants – will be restricted to the second floor. This is simply so people who choose not to engage in that roleplay can easily avoid it, and it’s also quite fitting for our setting!

Feeding: If you choose to engage in feeding roleplay, feeding takes place at the wrist or neck according to the preference of the person providing the blood. Cover the spot you plan to ‘bite’ with your own hand to provide a physical barrier (and prevent larp crud.)

Disciplines

Ghouls and Vampires have Disciplines they can use throughout the evening. Ghouls will be limited to the Low power level for the larp. Fledglings and Neonates will be limited to Low power levels for the first two acts, but will be able to use Medium powers in the final act. Ancilla will be limited to Medium power levels for the first two acts, but will be able to use High powers in the final act. Remember that these are just guidelines, that you can be creative with Disciplines, and that – in the end – it is the targeted player who decides what will happen in the given scene though the player using the discipline can make suggestions.

Consent Negotiations

The consent negotiations we will use have been developed and used successfully in events like End of the Line, New World Magischola, and Convention of Thorns – two of those Vampire: The Masquerade events. The basic tenet of consent-based play is no one can do anything to your character without your consent. Discipline use, feeding, intimacy, and other interactions require negotiation.

Do not worry if you don’t do this perfectly! The most important thing is to work out something that works for both players!

This video (starring Nicole and other Toronto friends) shows how this negotiation might work in a wizard school game:

When using consent negotiations, the recipient decides how disciplines affect them. No one can force you to do or say anything without your consent. Some scenes, like those that involve violence or feeding, require additional negotiation to make sure everyone is on the same page.

Playing consensually emphasizes three principles:

Players are more important than larps: The well-being of you as a player is more important than any scene or plot.

It’s not about you: If someone doesn’t want to play a certain scene or theme, they don’t need to explain why. Their boundaries have nothing to do with you, so don’t take them personally.

Every encounter requires negotiation: This does not mean you need to negotiate a discussion with someone, but everyone has very different boundaries: Nicole is fine with everything from a touch on the shoulder to jumping on a 6’7” dude like a spidermonkey; Gary doesn’t like people he doesn’t know to touch him. Both are fine! Boundaries also may change over the course of the larp and that’s fine. It’s not about you! Negotiate encounters and make sure both parties are on the same page before continuing.

How does it work?

You step out of game briefly using the cue “Off Game: Consent Negotiation” then follow it with the type of action you wish to negotiate. An example might be, “Romance” but the question can be used for a variety of situations, including feeding, rituals, rivalries, bullying, etc.

You physically take a small step backward, to give both players space.

Take 3-5 seconds to think before you respond to a request. This allows you to switch out of character and evaluate your feelings as a player – our boundaries off game are often different than our characters’ so it’s good to consider for a moment.

The responses to the prompt from the other players in the negotiation are: “No, thank you” and “Yes, please.”

If a player responds “No, thank you,” your response to them is, “Thank you.” Thank them for setting a boundary, because boundaries make everyone feel more secure pushing

the limits of play. Do not ask anyone to explain themselves and do not push the issue. This ends the negotiation, but it does not have to end the roleplay. The scene can continue as it is possible the player was simply not interested in that roleplay path.

When a player responds “Yes please,” that starts the next phase of negotiation. The initiator now asks, “How would you like to play this?” Do not offer suggestions right off – allow the other person to respond with their thoughts first. The response should be from the player, not the character.

The response must be something specific. “I don’t know, what do you want?” or “I’m up for anything!” are not specific. By being specific, both people know exactly which boundaries are set. If a player cannot be specific, the negotiations are over and play along the suggested line cannot go forward. We need to know our own boundaries as well as others!

After the person names a specific thing — like “I am comfortable with holding hands,” then they ask the same question to the other person. Their boundaries may actually be stricter than the responder and that’s okay! Each person gets to negotiate.

A player at The Terminal Benefit in Vancouver in 2018 drew a flowchart that provided the idea for this one – Nicole forgets the name, but offers many thanks. This is a visual representation of the consent negotiation process:

Not everyone will want to participate in all types of scenes and that’s fine. Remember: it’s not about you. Setting boundaries makes everyone feel safer playing more intense content. Please don’t say “Yes, please” to a scene unless you really mean it. None of us wants anyone else to feel uncomfortable for the sake of a scene. People are more important than larps.

Again, we will briefly recap this at the top of our off-game workshops on Saturday! Looking forward to seeing you all soon!